choices to be made?
by love4jommy
Summary: Tommy left jude set after season two. What will happen will Jude ever forgive Tommy? Will Tommy ever come back and if he does will their be a happy ending for Jommy? and what about this shane char?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N I own nothing if i did tim rozon and alexz johnson would be in ever ep with tons of jommyness lol, this story is put together with my ideas and with the awesome help from shannon she rocks! Her screename on here is Tommy4eve and she has one of my fav fan fic's right now high school years so make sure you check her out as well **

_**Tommy Quincy has been gone from my life now for… three months, five days, and 16 hours and I'm still alive. Still breathing. Three months, five days, and 16 hours and I still manage to live life… at least in some way. He still invades my every waking and sleeping thought alike though. When he left he left me with a million and one questions. A million and one questions that may never be answered.  
God, who would have thought that I would be sitting here thinking about Little Tommy Q, a man that I had ridiculed and laughed at just about my whole life. Who would have thought that I would fall in love with him? I sure didn't. I never liked him from the start, well, maybe not him, but his music at least. He was a sell-out in my eyes. He had no real passion for music and was in it for the money.  
I believed that until the docks at least.  
It was then, in that day, in that moment that we shared, with me looking deep into his gorgeous blue orbs, that I knew that music was his thing, and that he loved—loves—it.  
Then he left.  
We had grown so close over the past two years. We could look at each other and know what we were thinking or what we were feeling. We could read each other like books, cover-to-cover. When he smiled even the worst day was righted. Just that famous smile, at least famous to me because I never saw him give it to anyone else, would make me feel like I was flying. When we wrote music together is just clicked, and that I will always remember. The late nights in the studio, either working hard or goofing around, but they were always spent with him, or even if he was riding me to get a song perfect, I would be in the happiest place in the world.  
Our kisses, like my sixteenth birthday one, even though it ended badly, was incredible. Better then Shay's by far. Then that kiss right after we recorded White Lines and D okayed our second album, I wanted to continue that kiss so badly, but I pulled back. I was afraid, even though I loved—still love—him so much. All out stolen glances and the once that were supposed to be secret but we were painfully aware of them each time my eyes hit him or his eyes hit me, we could both feel it. We knew when we were looking when our backs were turned.  
Why had he left?  
He must have felt something right? He must have loved me, at least in some form, right? Was it really so easy for him to just leave me like that? Why? That was the question that stood out from the million and one other ones that I had floating around my brain: why?**_  
"Earth to Jude! Earth to Jude!" A voice penetrated my thoughts and I jumped, looking up at Kwest.  
"Huh, what?" I asked, still half engrossed in thought.  
"Are you ready to record your first song on your third album?" He asked, clapping his hands together and rubbing them, licking his lips. This was something that I thought I would be doing with Tommy.  
"Sure, I guess so. Hey Kwest?" I asked, looking away and into the distance.  
"Yah Jude?"  
"You know that it's been over three months, right?" The pain was evident in my voice, no matter how much I tried to suppress it.  
"Yes, Jude, I know." Kwest whispered, sitting down in the chair next to mine.  
"Still no word from him?" I asked for about the billionth time ever since a week after he left.  
"No Jude, still no word. Even if he was back it is up to him to come to you. Even if he did make any contact, you would be the first to know. If he comes back at all." He murmured the last part under his breath.  
"What do you mean "if"?" I demanded, my head snapping back to him harshly.  
"Lets not talk about it right now, okay Jude?" His voice had a hint of irritation in it.  
"Yah, all right Kwest, set up the board, I'm ready."  
So now that I'm in the recording booth with the headphones on, guess whom I'm about to sing about.

_**Tommy Quincy**_.

Lay a whisper on my pillow  
Leave the winter on the ground  
I wake up lonely, is there a silence  
In the bedroom and all around

Touch me now, I close my eyes  
And dream away...

It must have been love, but it's over now  
It must have been good, but I lost it somehow  
It must have been love, but it's over now  
From the moment we touched till the time had run out

_**You must have loved me Quincy. You must have.**_

Make believing we're together  
That I'm sheltered by your heart  
But in and outside I turn to water  
Like a teardrop in your palm

And it's a hard winter's day  
I dream away...

It must have been love, but it's over now  
It was all that I wanted, now I'm living without  
It must have been love, but it's over now  
It's where the water flows, it's where the wind blows

It must have been love, but it's over now  
It must have been good, but I lost it somehow  
It must have been love, but it's over now  
From the moment we touched till the time had run out

_**Good-bye Tommy. I can't hurt anymore. Please be safe and be loved, that's all that I ask**_.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 Tommy

A/N again Shannon rocks she helped me with this as well you can not say how AWESOME SHE IS!! Oh btw I do not own IS wish I did then it would be JOMMY 24/7

I've been sitting here staring at the same God dammed spot on the same God dammed wall for the past three hours, and the only thing, the only person, that I can think about is Jude. Not my dead grand-mere, which is the only reason why I left Jude, like I should be. Has it really been over three months since I last saw her? Since I last talked to her? I want to call her so badly and just tell her how much I love her and how much I'm hurting, not only because my grand-mere is dead, the only other woman besides Jude that I have ever been able to love with my whole heart, but also because I hurt her once again.  
God, I have hurt her so many times, I wouldn't be surprised if she hates me. First, in the first day that I met her, I tell her that her music, well, her song, sucks. Then I kiss her and tell her to pretend that it never happened. Oh, it gets worse. I start dating her older sister, Sexy Sadie. Yah, stupid of me, and I really did like her, but just not like Jude. Sadie was just the closet thing that I could get to Jude. Unless I wanted to date her mom. Or her Gran. Ew. No. erasing those thought from my head. Wait, there was one more thing wasn't there? Ah yes… when she asked me to go on tour with her. I never went because of Sadie. Because I was afraid, and even though she didn't show it, I knew that that had hurt her.  
I'm such an idiot.  
You know, now that everything is over with here, like dealing with the lawyers and her house and a bunch of other legal shit, also giving her the funeral that she deserves, I could call Jude, or at least go back to Toronto. To see Jude again, hear her angelic voice, smell her sweet sent… why is it that whenever I think of Toronto, of home, the first thing that comes to mind is Jude, and not my other obligations? Oh, right, because I love her. I am head over friggin heels in love with Jude Harrison. It's everything about her. The way that she can tell when something is bothering me. The way that whenever she does something embarrassing or she lets on how she feels, or felt, about me, she turns as red as her hair used to be. The way that, without fail, she can always make my worst day so much better just by smiling at me and telling me that everything will be okay. The way that when she's writing a song she chews on her lip or the back of whatever writing utensil that she's using. Her laugh, her smile, her voice, her stubbornness, her cockiness, and her fiery personality all make me love her even more. And the way that no matter how many times I have hurt her she always forgives me. Always let's me back into her heart and her life. I don't think that after this time she will be able to though.  
Have I mentioned how much I love her yet?  
I wouldn't have left her like that that night if the family lawyer hadn't made it sound like grand-mere had hours to live instead or months. I would have sat her down at the dinner and told her everything, and she would have hugged me and told me that everything would be all right, and I would feel better. I knew it. I most likely would have bought her a plane ticket and took her with me. And if that waiter hadn't stopped her, I would have let her stop me. I would have ignored that bald asshole and sat down with her instead of leaving her hurt and alone in the street.  
You wanna know something else?  
I have written at least ten songs to tell her how sorry I am. How much I miss her and need her, but they are all crap. Except for one. One of them I want to sing for her. I will someday, but something is holding me back from singing it for her. From going back. I think that it's fear. Fear of rejection and her reaction. Why am I such a wuss? Yes, I am admitting that, but only in my mind. Not out loud.  
I sigh and look away from that spot and take out my songbook. I turn to the song and read it over.

A hundred days have made me older  
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face  
A thousand lies have made me colder  
And I don't think I can look at this the same  
But all the miles that separate  
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby  
But you're still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
And I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
But you're still with me in my dreams  
And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rollin'  
As the people leave their way to say hello  
I've heard this life is overrated  
But I hope that it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby  
But you're still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
And I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
But you're still with me in my dreams  
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go  
It gets hard but it won't take away my love  
And when the last one falls  
When it's all said and done  
It gets hard but it won't take away my love

I'm here without you baby  
But you're still on my lonely mind  
I think about you baby  
And I dream about you all the time  
I'm here without you baby  
But you're still with me in my dreams  
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Then an ingenious idea hit me. I would find a band and a small studio and record it. then send it to Kwest and have him give it to Jude for me. No… I will just send it to Jude. I don't want to make Jude madder by sending it to Kwest first. That would definitely get to her. I gave a small smile at my plan. Sure, it was a slightly wuss move to send to song to her rather then just go there and sing it to her myself, but at least she would know how I feel about her. Maybe then I would go back. Maybe.


	3. Chapter 3

-1Here's a little back-story on Jude ever since Tommy left. Number one on the charts and nothing could bring her down from this music high that she was riding contently on. Her love life on the other hand, not so high. Unfortunately, everywhere that Jude looked, there were happy couples in their happy couples world. Sadie and Kwest are as strong and cute together as ever. Spied and Karma as well. Wally and Kyle have girlfriends, Stephanie and Theresa. Hell, even Jamie and Patsy. Jude felt all alone, and in her eyes, it was all because of Tommy. She had lived and breathed only Tommy since that one unforgettable (even though she found herself wanting to forget it… sort of) day on the pier. Even when she was dating Shay, Jamie, and then Spied, she—and almost everyone else—always knew that her heart could only belong to Lord Squinty Frown his self. She was really only dating them because Tommy and her couldn't be together. She was too young. But now all that just seemed like a dream in a distant world. Jude was virtually alone, but maybe she didn't have to be… 

"Jude! Jude! Earth to Superstar!" Shane yelled, waving a hand in front of Jude's blank stare with slight inpatients. 

"What? Oh, sorry Shane, I didn't hear you. Or see you for that matter. I was in my own little world." Jude apologized, snapping out of it and smiling up at Shane, her hairstylist and good friend. She smiled back. 

"It's okay. Just let me make you the Rock Goddess that everyone knows you are for your next photo shoot, and it's all good." Was her apology accepting reply. 

"Oh yeah, you are a funny one." Jude stated with a little sarcasm.  
Shane's Thoughts: To me you are a Rock Goddess. Why do all the good one's have to be straight? Then again, I do catch her looking at me from time to time… wait, this is me; I can get any girl that I want to. 

"Jude, you know that you are gorgeous. People should bow down to you because you exceed anyone in looks, singing, style, and personality." Shane complimented, knowing that girls love compliments because, well, she is one. 

"Okay, enough with the compliments there. Hey, I have an idea. Why don't we skip this whole ordeal and you can go try teach me how to board again." 

"Key word there is "try". Girl, you have no balance." Jude's jaw dropped for a second, but them she composed herself, 

"Well you have no sense of fashion," she said with smugness, like they were in Grade School again and she just made up the best come back in the known world. 

"Oh, now you're going to get it." With that Shane started to chase Jude around the room, caught her, and tickled her until Jude finally broke. 

"Okay! Okay! Fine! You're a fashion icon!" She yelled between huge fits of laughter. Shane stops and looks down at Jude. Suddenly, everything seems still, and she knows that this is the moment. She leans in, but Jude jumps and breaks away. 

"Shane, no, I'm sorry, but I don't like girls like that. I'm not—" She stops and glances around nervously and lowers her voice to a whisper—"I'm not lesbian." 

"No, I know that, but I believe that you may be Bisexual." Shane states calmly and clearly, causing Jude to look around nervously again.  
"I don't know what you're talking about Shane." Jude's voice is now barely a whisper. 

"Come on, I'm not stupid. I can see the way that you look at me when you think that I'm not paying attention or watching. Don't act dumb, I know that you like me at least a little bit, so forget damn labels and just have some fun." Shane didn't lower her voice, and Jude shook her head slightly, about to say no, but stops.  
Jude's Thoughts: Well, I do like Shane, and she clearly knows that, but what about Quincy… he's not a girl, and Shane's not a guy… now I'm all confused… ugh! Whatever! It's just going to be having some fun, and everyone knows that I need that. 

"Alright, but let's take it slow please. I know that I could never be with any other guy but Tommy... so... I might as well, so to say, bat for the same team. Just fun, right?" Shane smiled widely, and nodded. 

"Fun." They shook on it. "So do you want to do this right? Dinner and a movie sort of thing?" Jude thought for a second, and weird sensation overcoming her. What was she getting herself into? 

"No, how about just order some pizza to your place?" She suggested instead. 

"Sure, sounds great." Shane grabbed Jude's hand and they walked out together, completely unaware that one paparazzi clicked a shot off. 

**Later At Shane's Apartment**  
As soon as they walked in Jude walked over and threw herself on the couch, making herself comfortable, which is what she had gotten accustomed to doing from being over here so much. 

"Alright, so here we are. What do you want to watch?" Shane asked, sitting net to her on the couch. 

"Um… Final Destination 3!" Jude said excitedly. 

"Jude, every time we watch that, you get so sacred that death is going to come get you in the night that you crash on my couch. Or is that what you want?" 

"I really don't know. Maybe it is. I have never been with a girl before—or a guy for that matter—and I'm scared. I don't know what to do. I just think that you should know right now that Tommy owns my heart 100 percent and it will always be his, never yours. Fair warning." Shane laughed a little to cover up a little bit of disappointment. 

"Jude, just fun. I'm not proposing or anything." Shane nudged her slightly in a teasing way.  
Shane's Thoughts: But maybe, just maybe, one day it will be mine. You never know. And damn that man for turning her against love. 

"Yeah, yeah. Just fun. Okay." Jude shook her head a little but as if snapping out of something. 

**2 weeks until Jude's birthday, and her and Shane have been going strong  
Tommy**

Tommy, just waking up, stretches and get out of bed, get dressed, and goes to get the Talk National. He never really believes them because he knows that it usually just fake stories fabricated from some unfortunate pictures taken and the wrong—or in paparazzi eyes right—time. 

This morning, Tommy was in for a shock. 

On the cover, screaming out at him in bold, big, and annoying yellow print; **JUDE HARRISON GONE THE GAY WAY!!!!**  
Tommy opened the paper up and read looked at all the pictures, starting with the one taken two weeks ago with Shane and Jude walking hand-in-hand, and ending with a picture of them stealing a swift kiss outside of G-Major.  
Tommy's Thoughts: No, this can't be happening! Jude Harrison, my girl, couldn't be into girls! She can't be lesbian! I am going to go back on her birthday and win her back no matter what. I thought that maybe she would meet another guy to get over me, but that's easily dealt with. A girl though? I never thought. This can't be my fault.  
And with new found conviction, Tommy slammed the tabloid down on the seat next to him and sped back to where he was staying to start making plans. 

**Back to Jude**  
Jude bent down to pick up the Talk National that was always delivered to Shane's apartment and brought it inside, not paying attention to the cover. She sat down at the table in the sun and finally took a look at it. Her heart stopped and her head swam. 

"Shane! Did you see what they are calling me in Talk National?" Jude screeched, scaring Shane so bad that she fell out of the bed. 


End file.
